TriangGULO (Chapter 21)

Lorraine became a bit outgoing. Every Saturday we're going out. Shopping, partying, having fun and a lot more. Pero dahil hindi siya pala-gala, ako ang laging nag-iisip kung sa'n kami pupunta. One time I talked to her when we were sitting at the bench kung saan siya laging naka-tambay.
Kuhanan nun ng cards for 3rd grading. Both of us decided to don't go home yet. Sa parehas na dahilan, boredom. I just like it when we have one feeling. Feeling ko, nasa kanya ang puso at isip ko. I know this sounds corny but can you stop me from feeling it? Nagmamahal ako. Alam kong mali ang mahalin siya pero mali rin bang di mapigilan ang sarili ko?
"Tara na, Lorraine. 'La naman tayong ginagawa dito eh." I encouraged her to just go home kasi naman nakatunganga lang kami dun. But behind that, I wanted something more.
"Hindi ka pa ba satisfied sa kinalalagyan mo ngayon? Sabi mo kanina ayaw mo pang umuwi tapos ngayon na-boring ka lang gusto mo na agad umuwi."
"Eh wala nga naman kasi tayong ginagawa dito eh." I reasoned out.
"Pa'no kung sa pag-uwi natin dun palang mangyari yung bagay na makapag-aalis ng boredom mo? Pa'no kung pagsisihan mo yun?" The melting look of Lorraine dela Cruz. Ayun na naman siya.
"Edi, bahala na!" I was just looking at her.
"Hindi pwedeng laging ganun. Walang mangyayari sa'yo" Seriousness on her eyes.
"Teka teka. Ba't ang serious mo? Alam mo," I stood up, "buti pang ikaw naman ang mag-pasyal sa'kin. Lagi na lang ako. Ikaw naman this time!"I smiled to her.
"Hindi ko naman hiniling yun sa'yo. Ikaw ang may gusto. Ngayon, since ako ang inaalok mo," she also stood up, "ako na'ng mag-papasyal sa'yo." She extended her hand to take mine. I didn't hesitated cause it's my moment.
Nilibot niya ako sa simple places na nakapagpapasaya daw sa kanya. Dinala niya ako sa library, sa theater room and lastly, sa tambayan nila ni Luke, sa garden ng school.
"Ba't mo ako dinala dito? I sat on the swing.
She also took her seat. "Mahalaga kasi 'tong lugar na 't eh. Dito ako pinaka-sumasaya," she looked at me and smiled, "Dito ko laing nakakasama ang taong pinakamamahal ko. And I want to thank you for that." She bowed her head as a sign of gratitude.
"Wait, why me?" I confusingly asked her.
Sighed. She rested her arms on her laps and looked from far away, "Kung di dahil sa'yo di siya magpapatulong sa akin na ligawan ka. If not for you, I won't be with him."
"With him? He wants to court me?"
"Oo. Sobra." She looked at me and smiled with a lot of pain, "Alam kong may gusto ako sa kanya. Pero pag nakilita ko siyang masaya, sumasaya na rin ako."
"Sumasaya? Eh di ba dapat masaktan ka?"
Again, she rested her arms on her laps and looked from far away, "Alam mo ba kung bakit laging nasasaktan ang mga tao? Lalo na pag-dating sa love?"
"Bakit?" Her look at that time was mouth-watering.
"Self-contentment." She looked at me again but her arms were still on its place. "Masyadong mataas mag-expect ang mga tao. And I'm trying to avoid that."
"Kaya pala," sabay tango ng ulo ko.
"Bakit?"
"That's why I'm always hurt. Wala ako nun." We looked at each other seriously. I admit it, at that time, I was imagining that we were on a movie. Magkakaroon ng kissing scene after that gaze. Pero siyempre, sino ba naman ako para gawin yun sa kanya. Baka yun pa ang maging dahilan ng pag-iwas niya sa akin.
She chuckled. Chuckled and chuckled then laughed with all her heart.
"Na.... Napano?" I feel embarrased.
She tried to stop then asked me something, "Isn't the stars at the sky are beautiful?" She looked up at the sky. As if it was nighttime. "But do you know its purpose scientifically? Do you know its meaning emotionally?"
"Ayan ka na naman eh. You're being mysterious again!" Pero yun ang gustong-gusto ko sa kanya.
"Mysterious ba ang magtanong about the simple things na hindi natin napapansin?" She looked at me and said, "Maswerte ka kahit paano. May-kaya, matalino kahit papano at tingin ko, madaling ma-fall sa'yo ang mga tao."
"Mga tao?" Naglaro sa wild imagination ko, bakit tao? Bakit hindi boys ang ginamit niya? Is she already falling for me?
"Ang pagka-fall in love it's not only on opposite sexes. It's about everyone. Loving everyone. Kaya ikaw, "she patted my shoulder, "wag mong sayangin ang swerte mo." She stood up and walked away from me.
"Hindi ako magiging swerte. Hangga't di ko nalalamang may gusto ka sa'kin." I'm courageous to say that thing because she's a bit far away to me. "Uy! Sa'n ka pupunta?"
"Uwi. Tara?" Then, she extended her hand again to take mine. I wish she'll take the whole me, forever.